"She was becoming"

"I remember studying an anthropology article in family science years ago. The details are a bit vague, but the essence of the article was that our English language is so flat and inadequate in describing the experience of a new baby. "Giving birth" we say, as easily as we say, "giving to charity" or "giving up." In one culture, the word for giving birth meant "becoming a mother" but the word was not so limited. It meant not only only "becoming a mother" but "becoming a mother to this child," a word full of meaning and substance. It meant that no matter how many times a woman had been a mother, when she gave birth, it was a sweet, precious, unique experience. She wasn't just "giving birth," she was entering into a new relationship, a whole new way of being. She was becoming. The child was not an afterthought, a number, or an object that could be given. It was such an essential part of the experience that their language included it in their word for giving birth: "becoming a mother to this child.""**

I wanted to share this quote with you from a friend of mine because it describes so clearly what giving birth really means. Throughout pregnancy and labor a women experiences trials and pains that somehow form the beginning of what it means to be a mother. This is the beginning, not only of a child, but of a unit, a mother, and a family.

This is the beginning of the sacrifice, the pain, the love, the joy that we find in family life. Perhaps that's why this is such a potent memory for many women...this is when they first began to become a mother. This is also a point in time to become a family.

When I think back to my first labor, I remember throughout most of it my husband by my side. Holding my hand, rubbing my back, being very patient with me as I tried to make up my mind as to what would be the best for me at this particular time. (I think I would get quite bossy). It was a time that our relationship changed also. From being separate beings, to being one being trying to bring a life together into this world. I look back on it with fond memories because I feel like that was when becoming parents, together, really started. I was becoming, but so was my husband. It really is amazing really how our beginnings can serve as a link and a bond and a jumping off point to become a family.

**The link to where this blog is posted is under my blog list...Hands full of love and loving it(mostly).