"the antidote to fear is courage".
I read this quote in a book by Ina Gaskin and at first I thought it sounded a little strange. How could you have courage if you were afraid, and if you were afraid, how could you find courage? I saw a woman yesterday giving birth that gave a new meaning to this quote.
Her baby was a distressed and the doctor told her that if she couldn't push it out with the next push, then she would have to have a c-section. I saw such a look of determination on her face. It was pretty amazing to see. I know her husband and her both were afraid that there was something wrong with their baby. The pronouncement of c-section was also frightening. But this lady took it in and I saw courage in here that dispelled her fears.
She did end up pushing him out, but even if she hadn't, I still saw her fear dispealled by her decision to be couragous. I think that feeling would have carried over even if she did have a c-section. Now I guess the question would be, how do we find that courage? Especailly in the face of fear.
A labor and delivery nurse, doula, and mother muses about childbirth choices.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
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3 comments:
I was able to personally witness this taking place within my own body when, after sixteen hours of heavy labor, my first child's heartbeat dropped to 33 beats per minute, and the doctor prepped me for an emergency Caesarean. My uterus had ceased functioning, and I knew it was impossible to get that boy out without medical help. Crying and praying, for the first time in my pregnancy, I really wanted that baby. As another contraction mounted, the doctor and two others who had joined the team told me I could try one last push. Blood vessels had already burst all over my face and eyes. A nurse joined me on the delivery bed. Using her forearms and chest, she layed across me, and together we shoved that 8 lb. 14 oz. watermelon of a child from me into my doctor's waiting arms, and he said, "You have a son!" In that instant, I turned from a career woman, unsure if I even wanted to keep that baby, into a mother bear with her cub, and I knew, absolutely, that I would die for him. I had never loved anything or anyone more. Btw, David was the first of five, including a set of twin boys. He is now 29, and enjoying his own first son.
Thanks, for that comment...it's amazing what women can do if they dig deep enough. In fact I told the woman I was with that we saw the mama tiger come out:) I find it amazing what these kind of experiences can do for us.
That's really beautiful, and I've experienced something similar myself. Thank you so much for sharing!
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