New Beginnings Doula Training

New Beginnings Doula Training
Courses for doulas and online childbirth education

Friday, April 10, 2009

Holding on

I know there are times in my life that I struggle and struggle just to hold on to my sanity. So many times I have wanted just to give up or not wake up the next morning to the same thing. But I've pressed forward, knowing that the struggle will not last forever and that at some point after the struggle I find great rewards from going through that struggle.

Because of this I have come to realize that, while things can be rough at points in our life, the struggle to hold on reaps benefits in the end. I see this in labor as women work to find their way through the emotions of labor. In particular I see the difficulties of giving in. This is not really about whether or not you get an epidural or choose to endure the pain...this is about our emotional state. Emotionally when women have given in (whether or not they have an epidural), I see a look of despair and helplessness. It pains me to see this, because I want these beautiful women to know how strong they really are and how important what they have done and what they are doing is.

I want to hold them and rock them and tell them to hold on...just hold the end..after the pain...will be joy.

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Birth is a Journey: Does it have to be life changing?

  • One woman might have to climb on an overfilled boat, risking her life and nearly dying as she escapes over the ocean to come to this land. This experience could certainly be life altering. It may very well color the rest of her life, positively or negatively. (I overcame this amazing struggle and here I am triumphant! OR Holy crap, that was SO hard I don’t know if I can go on! By the way, neither response is “right”. No one would judge the woman with the 2nd response.)
  • One woman may buy an airplane ticket, sit on a comfortable 747 and fly to America with a nice smooth flight and landing. She is happy to be in America. Those welcoming her are glad she is here safe and sound. She may only travel by plane 2-4 times in her life, so it is pretty memorable. But the journey itself probably wouldn’t be life changing; it would simply be a journey.
  • One woman may learn to fly an ultra-light plane to lead a flock of geese into America teaching them to migrate. This experience could certainly be empowering and life altering.